"You must love in such a way that the person you love feels free."

- Thích Nhất Hạnh

Hi Reader,

Love has been on my mind lately. Over the weekend, my husband and I celebrated 21 years since we first met - on Valentine’s Day, no less! The irony isn’t lost on me, considering we don’t celebrate commercial holidays 😅

We’ve both been stretched thin this past month, so I planned a last-minute staycation in our beautiful city, Edinburgh (note to self: never book Valentine’s weekend last-minute!) It turned out to be magical - wandering through independent bookshops, lingering in cafés, and indulging in delicious food in charming Stockbridge. Sometimes, I still can’t believe we call this place home!

What Does KonMari Have to Do with Relationships?

I first met Karim when I was 17 - just days after being ceremoniously and publicly dumped. My friends rallied me to go out, and though I carried a deep wounds of insecurity and low self-worth, I made a pivotal decision in that moment: I would preserve my dignity, move on, and trust in something better.

Marie Kondo’s book didn’t exist yet, but I now realize that my 17-year-old self was already practicing a core KonMari principle: letting go with love.

I didn’t beg to be taken back.

I wasn’t bitter (okay, maybe just a little).

Instead, I focused on what I had learned. One key takeaway? My future partner wouldn’t be a gamer. (No shade to gamers - I used to be one myself 👾!)

And wouldn’t you know it? It manifested one week after I got dumped✨.

Karim is a rare breed - he doesn’t game...! But more importantly, he has given me unconditional love, space to heal, and endless patience over the years, allowing us to grow alongside each other.

For that, I’m forever grateful. It’s a beautiful reminder of the power of aligning ourselves with joy and letting go with gratitude.

Decluttering the Mind & Heart

In the KonMari Method, we begin by visualizing our ideal life, space, partner, and self. This isn’t just woo-woo - scientific research supports the power of visualization. Elite athletes use it to enhance performance, combining visualization with physical practice to achieve the unimaginable.

But visualization is only the first step.

The second? Letting go with love and gratitude. No matter what challenges we face, there’s always something to be thankful for. Cultivating this mindset is like training a muscle - it strengthens our emotional resilience.

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If you’ve struggled with difficult relationships - whether romantic, professional, or familial - try this exercise:

💛 Close your eyes.
💛 Place one hand on your heart, the other on your belly.
💛 Bring to mind the person you’ve had challenges with.
💛 Reflect on what they have taught you. Maybe they helped you define your boundaries. Maybe they gave you the courage to step away. Or perhaps they showed you the kind of people you do want in your life.
💛 Now, say “thank you” with sincerity.
💛 Wish them well and release any resentment.

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Not all relationships are meant to last, and sometimes, we simply operate on different wavelengths - we don't have to be everyone's cup of tea, and that’s okay. ☕️
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Sending you space for aligned love,
Rebecca

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